New Year Resolutions!
In no particular Order of Priority.
1. Participate in the 21 Km Half Marathon end of the year
2. Get my GMAT Done
3. Get my ABRSM Grade 5 Done
4. Save up for A Trip end of Year 2006
5. Drive Safely
6. Learn to drive with all my different shoes
The thing about New Year resolution is that you'll probably need some place to record it down. This is to ensure we can check back on our completion at the end of the year. I can't remember what I've set for myself the year before. I think it had something remotely related to my weight. I might have achieved that though. I was tipping 72kg in the beginning of the year, and at its close I am at 68.5 kg.
I've already planned what I'm gonna do the very first thing when the second hand strikes the new year. DORAEMON!!!! Get ready!!! SMUUUUUUUUUUUUUACCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! I luv ya.!!!
Semplice Simon
Mood - Happy!
Feeling - Excited
Thinking - My Little Prince
Love - My Little Prince
Friday, December 30, 2005
Reviewing our Losses, Gaining that Strength
It'd been tradition for Mr. TeeVoh to review the major news in Singapore at the concluding of another year. There's been talk on what was the prevalent news for Singapore and for the world. Terrorist Attacks, Rise in Oil Prices, wars, deadly mutating viruses and Natural calamities, these are some of the things off my fingertips. In Singapore will have to be the increasing number of grotesque murder cases, LTA/LRTrelated issues, and not forgetting the NKF saga.
When we re-visit our dealings with catastrophic events and tragedies which have an impact of significant magnitude in our lives, it's perhaps a way to scale down our desperation, and comforting ourselves that at this very present moment, we had survived. Looking back at these unfortunate events and trying to quantify the experience, it had to be our first reaction, followed by how we struggled to manage them over time, and finally to come to terms with it.
It's a way for us to process these traumas and at some point in time, stand amazed at the sturdiness of human courage. We draw on each other’s strength, and seek to attune each other’s resolve and understanding, in working things out as a community. The common knowledge derived from all this? Finding strength and knowing we are not that alone after all.
I’ve met with a friend recently who related a story of her girl friend who lost the boyfriend during the Tsunami last year. They were resting in their room at the resort after diving and the waters came and took them by surprise. A stranger barely managed to pull her out of the waters when the resort nearly collapsed, but the boyfriend was no where to be found. After a few days of searching in vain, she flew back to Singapore devastated and drained. She kept crying. Much concern and consolation was offered by love ones, but she would not be comforted. It was her way of processing this tragedy on her own.
Over the weeks, she started to open up to friends and asking herself questions. Why life was as such? It was inequitable for her and she couldn’t quite accept the loss in its totality still. Her good friends brought her to church support groups for people who’ve met similar losses during the Tsunami. The results were to be celebrated. With much tears she was able to openly lament with the rest. She comforted others whose loss was felt greater than hers. Perhaps this transaction had diluted her concentrated focus on self, and re-aligned her to tap into a common strength.
Months later, remains of the boyfriend were finally found. She was called to identify and collect the belongings. This time, she did not manage this alone. Friends and family followed her and she learnt to tap into a community of strength for her personal loss. Smiling weakly through those tears of anguish, she was able to face up bravely to her loss. She had survived it.
Coming close to the end of the year, I’ve heard news about her. She still questions her loss. But was able to appreciate the strength she’d found in reiterating the account to her friends. She shared with them the whole process from the beginning, and this experience encouraged many afflicted in the end.
Is it good to recall our losses? Perhaps. The strength we'd gained along the way should not be forgotten too.
Semplice Simon
When we re-visit our dealings with catastrophic events and tragedies which have an impact of significant magnitude in our lives, it's perhaps a way to scale down our desperation, and comforting ourselves that at this very present moment, we had survived. Looking back at these unfortunate events and trying to quantify the experience, it had to be our first reaction, followed by how we struggled to manage them over time, and finally to come to terms with it.
It's a way for us to process these traumas and at some point in time, stand amazed at the sturdiness of human courage. We draw on each other’s strength, and seek to attune each other’s resolve and understanding, in working things out as a community. The common knowledge derived from all this? Finding strength and knowing we are not that alone after all.
I’ve met with a friend recently who related a story of her girl friend who lost the boyfriend during the Tsunami last year. They were resting in their room at the resort after diving and the waters came and took them by surprise. A stranger barely managed to pull her out of the waters when the resort nearly collapsed, but the boyfriend was no where to be found. After a few days of searching in vain, she flew back to Singapore devastated and drained. She kept crying. Much concern and consolation was offered by love ones, but she would not be comforted. It was her way of processing this tragedy on her own.
Over the weeks, she started to open up to friends and asking herself questions. Why life was as such? It was inequitable for her and she couldn’t quite accept the loss in its totality still. Her good friends brought her to church support groups for people who’ve met similar losses during the Tsunami. The results were to be celebrated. With much tears she was able to openly lament with the rest. She comforted others whose loss was felt greater than hers. Perhaps this transaction had diluted her concentrated focus on self, and re-aligned her to tap into a common strength.
Months later, remains of the boyfriend were finally found. She was called to identify and collect the belongings. This time, she did not manage this alone. Friends and family followed her and she learnt to tap into a community of strength for her personal loss. Smiling weakly through those tears of anguish, she was able to face up bravely to her loss. She had survived it.
Coming close to the end of the year, I’ve heard news about her. She still questions her loss. But was able to appreciate the strength she’d found in reiterating the account to her friends. She shared with them the whole process from the beginning, and this experience encouraged many afflicted in the end.
Is it good to recall our losses? Perhaps. The strength we'd gained along the way should not be forgotten too.
Semplice Simon
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Two Boys and a Parrot
Original Idea by N.Y.F , Dedicated to he who can make rocks bleed with emotions
In the beginning, there were two boys who got themselves a pet parrot. It was perfect. They promised each other to take care of it, clear its cage regularly from the dirty things, and to talk to it frequently.
Some weeks past, they took turn to clean the cage, talk to the parrot daily and to bath and care for it. Now this parrot was a very unique and special parrot indeed. It calls out the names of the two boys every time. Both of them found it so interesting, and became very excited about it.
But as the months past, the boys found imperfection about the parrot. It was something they didn't see initially. It has a clipped wing tip, a mismatched feather color on its tail and some feathers longer than others. And thus it was so, that one of the two, became less regular with the parrot's routine. Boredom and lethargy crept into his life. One fine day, he just couldn't be found anymore. But, the other continued, avidly cleaning the cage and talking to it.
Finally, it became only on one boy, to do these chores. He was dismayed. The other boy left, nobody knows why. But a strange but sad thing happened. The parrot stopped calling him, but instead, kept calling the name of the other boy which left. The boy, who remained, was reminded and determined to change the parrot's habit. He kept calling his own name instead, hoping the parrot would not call the name of the boy who left.
Many months past again, the parrot finally called the correct name. The boy who remained. He was happy and took great joy to nurse the parrot on his own. All these were not to be.
Another boy appeared one day and was interested in the parrot. The boy, who remained, was pleased and confident that the parrot would make a good pet for this new boy who came. He was careful to explain the clipped wing tip and its imperfect features while the new boy listened. He was not bothered and neither was he hesitant. He was ready to adopt and take care of the parrot.
Whatever came after was not widely discussed, the story must end here, and we'll never know.
Semplice Simon
In the beginning, there were two boys who got themselves a pet parrot. It was perfect. They promised each other to take care of it, clear its cage regularly from the dirty things, and to talk to it frequently.
Some weeks past, they took turn to clean the cage, talk to the parrot daily and to bath and care for it. Now this parrot was a very unique and special parrot indeed. It calls out the names of the two boys every time. Both of them found it so interesting, and became very excited about it.
But as the months past, the boys found imperfection about the parrot. It was something they didn't see initially. It has a clipped wing tip, a mismatched feather color on its tail and some feathers longer than others. And thus it was so, that one of the two, became less regular with the parrot's routine. Boredom and lethargy crept into his life. One fine day, he just couldn't be found anymore. But, the other continued, avidly cleaning the cage and talking to it.
Finally, it became only on one boy, to do these chores. He was dismayed. The other boy left, nobody knows why. But a strange but sad thing happened. The parrot stopped calling him, but instead, kept calling the name of the other boy which left. The boy, who remained, was reminded and determined to change the parrot's habit. He kept calling his own name instead, hoping the parrot would not call the name of the boy who left.
Many months past again, the parrot finally called the correct name. The boy who remained. He was happy and took great joy to nurse the parrot on his own. All these were not to be.
Another boy appeared one day and was interested in the parrot. The boy, who remained, was pleased and confident that the parrot would make a good pet for this new boy who came. He was careful to explain the clipped wing tip and its imperfect features while the new boy listened. He was not bothered and neither was he hesitant. He was ready to adopt and take care of the parrot.
Whatever came after was not widely discussed, the story must end here, and we'll never know.
Semplice Simon
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Unhinging Myself
The last one month of my life had been the most swiveling in my 28 years of living. Finally, I managed to unhinged myself fully and dwell into the presence of this special guy in my life. I thought it appropriate to update my blog with this short and honest account of what had happened to me in the past 1 month.
I had been careful and cautious in guarding myself from indulging in a relationship. Meeting up with Marcus had been really, a very special and unique event in my life, which changed certain perspectives and shook my momentum completely, much to my delight. We started SMSing each other before I went for reservist on 02 Oct 2005 and met on the 20 Nov 2005. My first impression of him was only slightly different from what I've expected him to be in my mind.
I was open to friendship then and wasn't surprised that my dormant potential BF detector didn't go running off wild at the sight of him. We had a great chat and I found his personality and character to be almost exactly to what I've picture on MSN. After going out with him for a couple of time, I found myself deeply attracted to him. To use a few words to describe him, I would say these in its sequence and order of development : He's intelligent and witty, sincere and honest with his views, intensely connected and in tuned with the emotional and psychological aspects of himself and others, and humorous and "cutely" adorable. Not forgetin sensitive, mature, and yet having a childlike charm. Well, but I'll save the bad points to myself first :P .
It didn't take me long to decide on taking the plunge. I didn't know where all these were coming from and didn't know where we might head towards, but I figure I didn't want to wait too long to find out. I wanted to give it shot. It might or might not turn out well, but I guess we all reach that age where these things simply become of distant importance in our lives. We can't always have the whole cake and eat it. There's always the giving and taking of a little, here and there.. After going out with him for the past 2 or 3 weeks, I felt a part of me still hanging like a door spoilt on half its hinges. It was swiveling uncontrollably in an erratic manner against the wind. I was not moving on as I ought to. It finally changed today, and I'm off those hinges.
Today is to be our 1 month "meet up" anniversary. My friend Ken reminded me to buy chocolates for him, but I decided not to. I remembered him not being keen on keeping count of days past and marking anniversaries. I could be wrong about that. We went to a Thai Restaurant today and my... was I surprised! After finishing our main course I casually reminded him that today was our 1 month meet up anniversary. I was expecting a blank look and nothing much after. Instead, a waiter brought this Thai pudding thingie in a cup with a candle lit on it. Confused ... I thought openly to him "Eh.. you mean this restaurant serve desserts with candles ar? Where's yours?!" He said he told the waiter it was my birthday and got them to do it while I was at the washroom earlier. Woooh.... I felt my stomach twirl.. Not from the Tom Yum soup.. But from this most beautiful gesture anybody had done for me in years. I wanted to swallow the dessert.. cup and everything in it. He said, "This kind of things must share one. .cannot eat alone, all the luck will run out!" LOL.. isn't he sweet?! :P
Marcus struck the most beautiful chord in my life. I hope we can be together forever.
Semplice Simon
I had been careful and cautious in guarding myself from indulging in a relationship. Meeting up with Marcus had been really, a very special and unique event in my life, which changed certain perspectives and shook my momentum completely, much to my delight. We started SMSing each other before I went for reservist on 02 Oct 2005 and met on the 20 Nov 2005. My first impression of him was only slightly different from what I've expected him to be in my mind.
I was open to friendship then and wasn't surprised that my dormant potential BF detector didn't go running off wild at the sight of him. We had a great chat and I found his personality and character to be almost exactly to what I've picture on MSN. After going out with him for a couple of time, I found myself deeply attracted to him. To use a few words to describe him, I would say these in its sequence and order of development : He's intelligent and witty, sincere and honest with his views, intensely connected and in tuned with the emotional and psychological aspects of himself and others, and humorous and "cutely" adorable. Not forgetin sensitive, mature, and yet having a childlike charm. Well, but I'll save the bad points to myself first :P .
It didn't take me long to decide on taking the plunge. I didn't know where all these were coming from and didn't know where we might head towards, but I figure I didn't want to wait too long to find out. I wanted to give it shot. It might or might not turn out well, but I guess we all reach that age where these things simply become of distant importance in our lives. We can't always have the whole cake and eat it. There's always the giving and taking of a little, here and there.. After going out with him for the past 2 or 3 weeks, I felt a part of me still hanging like a door spoilt on half its hinges. It was swiveling uncontrollably in an erratic manner against the wind. I was not moving on as I ought to. It finally changed today, and I'm off those hinges.
Today is to be our 1 month "meet up" anniversary. My friend Ken reminded me to buy chocolates for him, but I decided not to. I remembered him not being keen on keeping count of days past and marking anniversaries. I could be wrong about that. We went to a Thai Restaurant today and my... was I surprised! After finishing our main course I casually reminded him that today was our 1 month meet up anniversary. I was expecting a blank look and nothing much after. Instead, a waiter brought this Thai pudding thingie in a cup with a candle lit on it. Confused ... I thought openly to him "Eh.. you mean this restaurant serve desserts with candles ar? Where's yours?!" He said he told the waiter it was my birthday and got them to do it while I was at the washroom earlier. Woooh.... I felt my stomach twirl.. Not from the Tom Yum soup.. But from this most beautiful gesture anybody had done for me in years. I wanted to swallow the dessert.. cup and everything in it. He said, "This kind of things must share one. .cannot eat alone, all the luck will run out!" LOL.. isn't he sweet?! :P
Marcus struck the most beautiful chord in my life. I hope we can be together forever.
Semplice Simon
Monday, December 12, 2005
The Fox and the Little Prince
It was then that the little fox appeared.
‘Good day,’ said the fox.
‘Good day,’ replied the little prince politely, looking but unable to see anything.
‘Over here,’ said the voice, ‘under the apple tree.’
‘Who are you?’ said the little prince, ‘You’re very pretty.’
‘I’m a fox,’ said the fox.
‘Come and play with me,’ suggested the little prince. ‘I am terribly sad.’
‘I can’t play with you,’ said the fox. ‘I am not tame.’
‘Oh! I beg your pardon,’ said the little prince.
Then after a moment’s thought, he added:
‘What does “tame” mean?’
‘You are not from these parts,’ said the fox. ‘What are you looking for?’
‘I’m looking for people. What does “tame” mean?’
‘People,’ said the fox, ‘they have guns, and they hunt. It’s a great nuisance! They also raise chickens. That is the only interesting thing about them. Are you looking for chickens?’
‘No,’ said the little prince. ‘I am looking for friends. What does “tame” mean?’
‘Something that is frequently neglected,’ said the fox. ‘It means “to create ties”.’
‘To create ties?’
‘Precisely,’ said the fox. ‘To me, you are still only a small boy, just like a hundred thousand other small boys. And I have no need of you. And you have no need of me. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you shall be unique in the world. To you, I shall be unique in the world.’
‘I’m beginning to understand,’ said the little prince. ‘ I know a flower… I think she must have tamed me…’
‘Quite possible,’ said the fox. ‘On this Earth one sees all manner of things.’
‘Oh! But that was not on Earth,’ said the little prince.
The fox looked rather intrigued.
‘On another planet ,then?’
‘Yes.’
‘I see. Are there huntsman, on this other planet?’
‘No.’
‘How interesting. And chickens?’
‘No.’
‘Nothing is perfect,’ sighed the fox.
But he resumed his train of thought:
‘My life is very monotonous. I run after the chickens; the men run after me. All the chickens are the same, all the men are the same. Consequently, I get a little bored. But if you tame me, my days will be as if filled with sunlight. I shall know the sound of a footstep different from all the rest. Other steps make me run to earth. Yours will call me out of my foxhole, like music. And besides, look over there! You see the fields of corn? Well, I don’t eat bread. Corn is of no use to me. Corn fields remind me of nothing. Which is sad. On the other hand, your hair is the color of gold. So think how wonderful it will be when you have tamed me. The corn, which is golden, will remind me of you. And I shall come to love the sound of the wind in the field of corn.
The fox fell silent and looked steadily at the little prince for a long time.
‘Please,’ he said, ‘tame me!’
‘I should like to,’ replied the little prince, ‘ but I don’t have much time. I have friends to discover and many things to understand.’
‘One only ever understands what one tames. People no longer have the time to understand anything. They buy everything ready-made from the shops. But there is no shop where friends can be bought, so people no longer have friends. If you want a friend, tame me!’
‘What do I have to do?’ said the little prince.
‘You have to be very patient,’ replied the fox.
‘First you will sit down a short distance away from me, like that, in the grass. I shall watch you out of the corner of my eye and you will say nothing; words are the source of misunderstandings. But each day you may sit a little closer to me.’
The next day the little prince came back.
‘It would have been better to come back at the same time of the day,’ said the fox. ‘For instance, if you come at four in the afternoon, when three o’clock strikes I shall begin to feel happy. The closer our time approaches, the happier I shall feel. By four o’clock I shall already be getting agitated and worried. I shall be discovering that happiness has its price. But if you show up at any old time, I’ll never know when to start dressing my heart for you… We all need rituals.’
‘What is a ritual?’ said the little prince.
‘Something else that is frequently neglected,’ said the fox. ‘It’s what makes one day different from the other days, one hour different from the other hours. There is a ritual, for example, amongst my huntsmen. On Thursday they dance with the village girls. So Thursday is a wonderful day for me! I can take a stroll as far as the vineyard. If all the huntsmen went dancing at any old time, the days would all be the same, and I should never have a holiday.’
So the little prince tamed the fox. And when the time for him to leave was approaching:
‘Oh!’ said the fox. ‘I am going to cry.’
‘It’s your own fault,’ said the little prince. “I never wished you any harm; but you wanted me to tame you…’
‘I know,’ said the fox.
‘And now you are going to cry!’ said the little prince.
‘I know,’ said the fox.
‘So you have gained nothing from it at all!’
‘Yes, I have gained something,’ said the fox, ‘because of the color of the corn.’
***
‘Goodbye’ said the fox. ‘Now here is my secret, very simply: you can only see things clearly with your heart. What is essential is invisible to the eye.’
‘What is essential is invisible to the eye,’ repeated the little prince, so as to remember.
‘It is the time you have wasted on your [fox] that makes your [fox] so important.’
‘People have forgotten this truth,’ said the fox. ‘But you must not forget. You become responsible, for ever, for what you have tamed. You are responsible for your [fox].’
‘I am responsible for my [fox]…’ the little prince repeated, so as to remember.
***
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
That Momentous Present
It's been a while since I've updated the blog. It is for a good reason though. I really love to share my trash, about the silly thoughts and ridiculous feelings I have on people and events around. It is a very profound algorithm, having to go through that short thinking process when an incident of the least importance in my life shoots pass at the moment, and enabling myself to generalize and make sense of it to my friends and most importantly, to myself.
I went for the stage musical "Rent" the other day. I didn't do much reading up on it before going for it. I must admit, the sound system and acoustics in Kallang Theater was not very conducive for me to pick up the words and story. I wished they were singing half the speed and “vowelized” more with exaggerated mouth contortions. And plus the fact I was sitting 3 storey up and looking down at everybody's forehead, it didn't help to know that the size of the actors were the size of my thumb held up in front of me. … Oh well, for 120 bucks and a lousy theater, what can we expect? I thoroughly enjoyed the second Act, where topics about love and human relationships were constantly serenaded. How fiercely they sang about the youthful passions and struggles in life and the courage to stay undecided, and be proud to pursue your dreams.
I was reminded a very simple lesson in life recently, by someone who's slowly and surely accelerating in importance to my life. Inspired by his "Car Park" theory, I likewise am going to allocate one very unique and special lot for him. The lesson is to focus on the present. The thought of it was so logical and obvious, and yet, it had simply slipped out of my mind over the years. Perhaps studying Computer Science had warped my thought patterns so much that I could instantaneously think up multiple scenarios and results, all possible assumptions and contributing factors to various branch of decision making, in that snap of a finger. This had perhaps been a stumbling block to me and had complicated my life more than I should allow it. I could cut it all down you know, and to simply concentrate on making the best of that momentous present. We can't control the future and we can't change what's past. But we can determine quite well and to turn things right for that second. We really ought to do this.
This is perhaps another lesson that I've learn from "Rent". A person who is full of self awareness, and not being afraid to admit his insufficiencies in life, to acknowledge his fears and its uncertainties, is indeed a rare beauty. We don't have to be absolute and definite all time. And when we do concede to those ambiguities in life, it is not a weakness, but a silent built-up to embrace them wholeheartedly at our own pace.
The story runs a lot deeper than the time I could spare to read up on it. I would rather put down my own understanding after watching than to follow the mainstream critiques. Then again, we should not have too much absolute, right? Having different perceptions and opinions is still the one common dignity in life.
Semplice Simon
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