Snoring Boredom

Ever since I had been attached, with this new wave of happiness and contentment flooding my life, I'd not been able to draw on those past depressing monotone of everyday single hood living (..That’s a mouthful..), to write a decent Blog entry worthy of thought. Not that any past entries had been a job well done either.

Today's our 2 months 1 day meet up anniversary. Poor Marcus had to put up with my snoring at night. While some couples has this problem of expressing sensitive problems in fear of treading on each other's toes, I'm glad not to have suffered this same fate with him. It was after these two months that things are getting more settled and many uncertainties are falling neatly in place. We’d been working on communication, and vocalizing our inner thoughts, sorting out our mixed feelings and other concerns. We've asked each other questions, or rather; I am the one with the most questions, and he being the one with the allegorical, yet sometimes blunt answers. Are we doing it right for each other in this relationship? Did you ask yourself that?

We’d worked out a routine and plan, encompassing the things that he needed to do for his resolutions this year, and my own personal commitments. Inevitably, when a routine and plan comes up, and with the warming up of our company to each other, the question of boredom comes around. Will we get bored with each other? That's a difficult one. But I’ve always enjoyed delving a little deeper into my own mind and heart. If you can’t understand yourself to provide a satisfying answer, who else is there to know you?

As with the many people who like asking me questions, I enjoy satisfying myself with the motive. With understanding of why someone asks a question, is better to answer it straight on, don’t you think so? A few deductions came into my mind. Is he bored already? Is he afraid of getting bored? Is he making allowance and preparation in the future to feel bored? Is he trying to prevent himself from being bored? Is he afraid of me being bored? Is he trying to probe whether I am bored? Am I boring him? Is he boring me? Are we boring the little bacterium circulating around as resulting from our very breath!?!??

There are these two kinds of boredoms in a relationship, the way I see it:

Outwardly bored- The routine of everyday living and the constraints in life are putting flat the level of excitement in a relationship.

Inwardly bored- One does not mentally/psychologically/emotionally/sexually etc... Engage, excites, satisfy, complements and stimulates the other.

Being both outwardly and inwardly bored, does not mean the end of love. Conversely, you don’t need to sustain love with excitement and rekindle it once in a new moon. One has to be very careful to separating these two matters. Separating these means you can solve one and save the other. Combining them would mean the end of everything hopeful. I’ve always felt this strong mutual exclusivity between Love and all the feelings and emotions.

The solutions to the above, is apparent and I won’t bother to state them here. Use your creativity and imagination to solve them. Make a ripple for starters; make bigger waves as you go along. It is not that difficult, really.

Honestly, I've never been involved in a relationship which is so comprehensive and open, and regular reviews on our understanding and expectations of each other. In fact, we were discussing the other day that our formidable formula to working things out between us, is that: I've experienced 5 year long relationship, and he having to live 5 years more than me. I cannot agree more. It's quite plain to me at times we clearly know what is happening between us and with the other party, not much guesswork or mind games there. The novice would still struggle with primary issues which I think we've already worked through subconsciously on a faster plane.

Semplice Simon